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Boomer Fantasies are Killing Us ! Vol 69

August 20, 2015

That’s no Lady, that’s my Wife  !                               – Rodney Dangerfield

Lately, I have been contemplating the future, extrapolating from the past and present, and I seem obsessed with trying to predict hobbies, trends, things to value, pitfalls, and world events. I even took time out from this blog to read a book, “Awaken the Buddha Within” ( by Lama Surya Das, Broadway Books ) to see if I could get some clarity in our 24/7/365 world.

This blog is about Boomers, our present and our future, the mistakes we are making, and the vast opportunities we have before us to become the greatest generation ever ! We are the richest, best educated, and safest generation in history. What we do with our environment, human rights, technology, and security will set the tone for many future generation, including our grandchildren. We are on the cusp of either spending the rest of our lives poor on the couch, or showing some initiative and building a better future. Its our choice !

Why the time off and introspection? Maybe because I turned 60 this year, and will shortly walk my eldest daughter down the aisle. Maybe because I don’t seem to have a label to now call myself, at least not one that feels comfortable. Most importantly, I am trying to see thru the various fantasies we Boomers seem to have entered, or created. It feels like driving into a large unexpected fog bank. Yes, you slow down a bit, but drive on, seemingly lost, in a cloud of doubt about where and when this will end.

As a Boomer, I am definitely going thru a life change. My views on work have evolved. Work always denoted a time commitment, with ego stroking pay and benefits, a purpose ( or excuse, depending on your motivation ), a funded lifestyle, and a reason to get out of the house.  This salary trap and work / life balance fantasy now looks stupid, a “work harder, not smarter” plan. Now, I realize that doing the things you enjoy are more important. If you have a job that gets you out of bed after a peaceful sleep, leaves time for exercise, family and friends, and keeps stress to a minimum well, you are lucky. Yes, you may have to somehow turn this time into a moneymaker of some type, but keep on this track – it’s a winner !

My views on sex have changed. This being Boomer Blog volume 69, perhaps it’s appropriate to discuss Boomers and their various fantasy stories. A 50 Shades of Boomer, perhaps. With the cheater website Ashley Madison’s customer information being recently released, and with the Gray divorce rates climbing, I am very happy to be celebration my 38th wedding anniversary this week. Marriage is work, but I guess I can now fully appreciate that the rewards out-weight the effort.  My fantasy that I somehow magically get a six-pack, and that sexy girl across the room is really looking at me well, I am almost over it.  My hope that my lovely wife will be transformed into a pre- menstrual hotty is misplaced. I know that some company just announcer a sex drug for women, a Viagra type stimulant. Good luck with that. I think I will just love the one I am with, and let real life be my fantasy.

Yes, there are other sexual fantasies, mostly illegal or immoral, and thankfully these seem to be a phase of our lives. Let them go. Otherwise, you may find your penis all over social media, or worse, jailed.  I am sure prison is not the place to advertise a sexual deviance !

My view of retirement has evolved. According to surveys, many of us fantasize that we will win a lottery, or get a big inheritance, so we can spend everything now. Household debt is at all time highs, and retirement savings are nowhere near close to what Boomers need to retire on. We have expensive lifestyles, and the sooner we realize that our needs are a lot lower than our wants, realism will creep into our fantasy. With the flow of reverse mortgages, inheritances are fading, and with no savings, …

My view of health is growing. Like many of my generation I smoked, drank ( infrequent, but intense ), ate excessively, and dabbled in narcotics. The fantasy was that I was invincible. I did exercise regularly, feeding my fantasy that it all balanced out. Well, with a new hip, a new knee, having undergone chemotherapy and full body radiation as part of a bone marrow transplant, all in my 50’s, that fantasy got ripped up. Looking at my circle of friends, it seems everyone has something. Parkinson’s, MS, heart attacks, nerve issues, it’s like we all have an industrial disease. As you can imagine, I applaud the wonders of modern medicine, but doctor’s can only do so much. Having a fantasy of invincibility will kill you. Now, I prefer the fantasy that I have the opportunity of living to 100, if I do the right stuff.

My view of humanity as vastly improved. Boomers were raised to acknowledge risk, and while we all did the things that helped minimize the dangers around us, it did bespeak of a negative or pessimistic world view. Remember, it was a “dog eat dog” world that evolved into the ME generation. Today, I could not be more optimistic  ! Yes, climate change is a worry, but are slowly addressing it, Yes, the Middle East remains a mystery, but Africa is emerging. Yes Donald Trump is growing in the polls, but maybe this is a good thing !

Since this blog works to present a positive push to Boomers to get off their asses and out-due the Greatest Generation, our parents, we do need to look at the fantasies that hold us back, that inhibit our individual ambitions.  To assist, I ask you to send me a note on your favourite Boomer fantasy, and the steps you suggest to successfully “drive through the fog”, and I will incorporate it into a future blog.

Next on Boomers – WTF ! ,  do Black Lives Matter  ?

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